Most managers are promoted because of their good individual performance. Such a mindset—that one’s own performance is the most important—is devilishly difficult to change, however, and employees suffer.
“It’s a hard lesson to learn, but the job of the manager actually is to help others do their job: Select them, guide them, help them, train them, but ultimately let them thrive and achieve. Not easy for someone who has reached the pinnacle by doing things themselves,” says Kevin Rockmann, assistant dean for research, professor of management, and the CGI Corporate Partner Faculty Fellow at Costello College of Business at George Mason University.
Rockmann’s research focuses on the brighter side of employee relationships—bonds that, without crossing any lines of propriety, promote trust and mutually beneficial collaborations. It is both common knowledge and common sense that organizations that prioritize such relationships benefit from greater employee engagement, higher retention, and enhanced productivity, among other positive effects.
No wonder business leaders wax rhapsodic about the importance of healthy working relationships between managers and employees. But Rockmann's research shows that in most cases, such talk exists in inverse proportion to the amount of attention managers actually devote to relationships and relationship dynamics. In the battle for managerial bandwidth, relationships routinely lose out to more immediate bottom-line issues (e.g., whether the "work" is getting done).
“It’s a hard lesson to learn, but the job of the manager actually is to help others do their job: Select them, guide them, help them, train them, but ultimately let them thrive and achieve. Not easy for someone who has reached the pinnacle by doing things themselves.”
— Kevin Rockmann, assistant dean for research, professor of management, and the CGI Corporate Partner Faculty Fellow at Costello College of Business at George Mason University
“Most of what bosses say about their ‘collaborative’ and ‘close-knit’ corporate culture is a form of gaslighting. And employees know it, which serves only to alienate them. That’s a major reason why disenchantment and disengagement are running rampant in today’s organizations,” Rockmann says.
In a recent executive development training involving a national fast-casual dining chain, Rockmann and his team took steps to address this. Participants were assigned to focus on the relational aspects of their job, intervene where necessary and document their results. Such outcomes not only were inspiring but also translate easily to any organization. “Giving systematic attention to relationships not only improved the interpersonal atmosphere in their units but also helped them personally and professionally in four main ways,” Rockmann says.
#1 Deeper, higher-level conversations. As Rockmann tells it, concentrating on relationships changed the nature of the participants’ conversations at work. “Instead of seeing things purely from their own individual point of view, they gained a more all-around perspective based on the input of others,” he says. Managers asked first for thoughts and ideas regarding problem areas rather than punishing or criticizing. This elevated their awareness from a limited focus on what most directly affected them to a broader mindset encompassing more of their context and environment.
#2 Less reactive decision-making. Relational attention separated stimulus from response, leading to less reactionary and more thoughtful responses during meetings and email exchanges. One regional manager was able to do this consistently with his people and found himself “not as angry” and that his people were taking greater ownership over their actions. As a result, decision-making became less knee-jerk, more deliberate, and ultimately more effective from a strategic standpoint.
#3 Reinventing restrictive roles. The new orientation enabled participants to engage in more intentional “relational job crafting,” whereby they began to embrace unprecedented partnerships and collaborations. One of the participants in HR connected with another in IT during the program and started to plan out trainings they could build together. Being together in a learning environment created possibilities for these types of solutions, simply by virtue of paying attention to interdependencies between individuals and teams.
#4 Escaping middle-manager entrapment. The participants were able to escape the trap that ensnares many a middle manager and prevents them from rising—namely, getting stuck playing caretaker or being the “answer man” for their teams. For example, one participant noted that her tendency was to solve problems right away, especially for other people. By relaxing this she was able to empower others in her team and grow their confidence. Forced to look outward and focus on how their teams were relating, they readily identified trusted and reliable team members who were natural candidates for greater responsibility. “This removed the sense of risk that often prevents managers from delegating day-to-day and, by extension, keeps them putting out fires instead of aiming higher. They moved from saying ‘fix things this way’ to asking ‘what do you think is the best way to address this issue?’, Rockmann says.
While these individuals in the exercise were in the food industry, Rockmann believes the leadership lessons to be learned here are universal.
Rockmann notes: “When managers take the focus off themselves and their own achievements so that they can pay close attention to others, they effectively step off the stage and enter the balcony. They remove themselves from the play and can see better what is going on around them. They become attuned and responsive to the complex relational environment and can confidently coach their people through it, ultimately bringing themselves, their teams, and their organization more success.”